Monday, January 3, 2011

Suck Grapes...

Brenda!! As I sit here with a plate of grapes the size of my *ss I think to myself, "suck it, Brenda!" I can eat all the grapes I want on Weight Watchers unlike your stupid diet that helped me lose so much weight so quickly and I was the happiest with my body that I've ever been and now I'm so miserable and why did you abandon me...?! God in heaven, I need a life...and therapy.

3 comments:

  1. Hang in there Elle AND Emily!

    NOTE: Since I am not a contributor to the blog yet and still a mere peon (did I spell that right?) in the world of LylasPlus I have to put my post as a comment to one of yours. LOL

    (Seriously, I am joking BUTTTTTT (ewwwww a big butt even looks bad in writing!!) if you so see it fit to adjust my status to contributor I couldn't complain. Oh wait a minute! I COULD complain b/c I can complain about just about anything~!!! Ohhh... there goes my damn ADD again running me off topic.... lol)

    Anyways, as I was saying (with a tone of cynical sound there) hang in there! It's a new year and things have got to go better!~ (Yes, I am trying to convince myself too!)

    While I did eat some ooey gooey cheesy enchiladas yesterday I justified it with the fact that it was my birthday AND I will be unable to eat for many, many days starting tomorrow. You see, tomorrow starts the disgusting clean out your innards drink fast before surgery routine. Hours of sitting and sitting on the toilet do NOT amuse me! BUT (damn that word is still big! Maybe I should say however. I'll give it a try! lol) However, (that just cracks me up! I imagine an old prude with a bun of gray hair and her glasses down her long witchy nose! Ok, seriously here. A.D.D. GET IN THE CORNER!)

    However, a good point is that I try very hard to think that many disgusting lbs are going down the toilet with that body cleanse!~

    I go into surgery Wednesday for my colon resection. They are taking out my entire sigmoid colon due to disease. Sound painful? Well, yea it is from what I hear. So, I am trying to physch myself up with the thought that I am also going to lose lbs! Now, I do not recommend this method of weight loss but a girl has to take what she can get right?

    I wanted to bring this up for two reasons:

    1. So you lovely ladies will know that I am not abandoning you but I will merely be MIA due to medical reasons.
    2. So that you will realize that a lifetime of bad eating can be VERY VERY dangerous! I have had a horrible couple of years due to this health crap and don't wish it on anyone. (Well, maybe an ex or two! forgive me God, please!!)

    Anyways, here is some encouragement for you two and hopefully a little bit of scare for you as well. If you need more scary thoughts about what bad eating COULD lead to let me know. It SUCKS!

    Know that I am on your side cheering you both on! On to a healthier eating life in 2011~!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Jonesie,
    Thank you for your contribution via comment. Thank you also for the words of encouragement. I wish you the best of luck with your surgery, recovery and overall health in 2011. Have fun on the pooper too!! I'll be thinking of you every time I use the restroom. Take care.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I ditto what Elle said! We are working on figuring out how to make you a contributor...we are just technologically challenged! I am so sorry you have to go through all this crap (and crapping :) We will head your warnings). We will be thinking of you and can't wait till your well enough to write again! We have become quite accustomed to hearing from you and being motivated by you!

    ReplyDelete